When I was sixteen I accidentally invented the word "iggitate". My mother always proper in grammar, spelling, and format pointed out to me, "Iggitate is not a word Laura. You can be irritated or agitated, but you can not be iggitated." My reply, "That's not true Mom, you are iggitating me right now!"
From an early age I was a rebel. A surefire way to get me to do something is to tell me I can't do it. Society is so caught up on boxing people in; everyone needs to be defined and labeled and shoved into a mold. For a country whose supposed to be founded on freedom we have an awful lot of restrictions. And then all those people who don't follow the protocol are meant to feel bad about themselves because of it. Why is that? why can't people just be.
If I filled out some census stating only the facts about myself it would be something like this: female, 29 years old, married, customer service, 4 year college degree, no children, 4'11'', brown hair, brown eyes...
That's not who I am. Monday I was a compulsive, relentless, overachieving perfectionist. Tuesday I was a bitter, angry, pessimistic, volatile creature. Wednesday I was a giggly, hyper, scatter brained, ice cream craving child. Thursday I was curious, inventive, exploratory, and nail biting. Today I am not sure yet as it's only 12 p.m. I try to define myself all the time, but after 29 years I think it's a wasted effort. We're always changing, growing, learning, and reshaping who we are. I am far from a commitment phobe, but I'll be damned if I have to shove myself into something that doesn't fit me just to make others around me happy.
How do you compromise without compromising yourself? If anyone has figured out a way to break the rules without getting arrested please let me know because I am still trying to keep from falling over the balance beam.
This blog much like my life probably makes little sense. It's okay. Gina told me to write for myself. So I'll stop obsessing over who is or ISN'T leaving comments. A little less iggitation in my life.
Visiters
About Me
- ElbieNy25
- "Scars are proof that we were brave enough to fight the battle and strong enough to survive it"-me 2008 Unfortunately/fortunately I have many scars from life, but I'm still here. I've been writing for over twenty years and just recently finished my first manuscript entitled "The Journey". I love peopl; they fascinate me with their stories, quirks, and mysterious ways.
4 comments:
lol.
I was (still kinda am) a societal rebel. I was a tomboy growing up, because I wasn't supposed to be.
The weird thing is, there are a lot of girly things I actually like! But it took me years to grow out of rebelling to appreciate pink and purple, dresses, chivalry, and the concept of marriage.
Ugh. Pink! When I was younger: age 6-22 I was obsessed with Barbie who is of course doused in all things pink. My childhood bedroom decorated by my mom was covered in pink as well.
I despised pink for years. Only in the last year I started to re-open my mind to pink. Pink and I are taking things slowly though, nothing serious yet.
I can relate somewhat. Most people label me as an introvert or shy, but I don't see myself that way.
I LOVE when you take my advice!! Not only do I think that it helps you, but it makes me feel good too since I have this inherent nature to try and help people help themselves!!
I think those that have stayed in your life, have stayed because you are not some checked off box when it comes to people. Both your strength and weaknesses make you who you are: an individual, unique, special. You and I have even had our differences, but we learn to build a bridge and get over it! I will see you when we are 60 and enjoying our old age!
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