In my sequel "10 Years Later" I am exploring the complexities of friends with benefits. In my real life I never experienced this first hand, well I did, but that person is now my husband...
I am reaching out to my blog followers for some insight. These two particular characters have a romantic history, but because of present circumstance can't indulge in a full out romance. They are incredibly close friends who have sex with one another. Here are the questions I want to know:
Can friends with benefits really work?
What's the difference between a good friend you have sex with and someone you're dating?
How are rules or guidelines for the arrangement determined?
Is it a bad idea between two people who have a romantic history with one another?
Call me naive, but I just don't get it. I know it exists and works for some people out there, but how? Did two people overcome with hormones yet commitment issues just randomly decide upon this arrangement? I'm curious and I think in my understanding of the friends with benefits concept I can make my story more believable. Thanks for your help.
Visiters
About Me
- ElbieNy25
- "Scars are proof that we were brave enough to fight the battle and strong enough to survive it"-me 2008 Unfortunately/fortunately I have many scars from life, but I'm still here. I've been writing for over twenty years and just recently finished my first manuscript entitled "The Journey". I love peopl; they fascinate me with their stories, quirks, and mysterious ways.
5 comments:
Trust me I would love to have an Alice. Nevertheless. How is the search for information for your sequel going? If I get any useful information in this department I will be sure to pass the it along to you.
I dont think it can really work. I think it's almost impossible for two people to be that intimate with one another without someone developing feelings. And then when the other person takes a step back, or walks away completely, you're left to pick up the pieces. (been there, done that).
I think the main difference with someone you're dating is that you know that person is going to be there for you not only physically but also emotionally. I just dont feel like the emotions are all there when the relationship is based solely on sex.
I dont know how rules are determined. In my situation the guy just said, "I dont want a relationship. But I need to make sure you are okay with that before we continue." I wasnt okay, but I lied. And got my heart broken.
I think its a terrible idea. Thats how my friends with benefit situation came about, and I just didnt get over him before we started fooling around, and then the feelings I had just continued, because we were basically doing the same things. Only he was emotionally detached!
Hope that helps!
p.s. This is Amy Sacco by the way. Just so you know LOL
It can work if both people are on the same page. Neither one is trying to make it any more or any less than it is.
I think it would work better with people who are not actually close friends. The combination of heightened emotional + heightened physical is probably going to lead to yearning for more. And once again if they're not both on the same page, it'll be trouble.
Thanks guys. Based on the feedback I am getting from people I think I am going to take this whole "friends with benefits" thing in a different direction...like it'll start out casual, but expectantly become something more.
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