If I posted a personal ad


You will never meet anyone like me and that's probably a good thing because if two of me existed an apocalypse would most likely ensue. A complete walking contradiction: the smartest dumb girl, spontaneous planner, easy going anal retentive, hardworking couch potato, introverted social butterfly, jaded eternal optimistic, naive skeptic, serious goofball, and reliable flake. Proudly a self proclaimed hug/cuddle whore. Like a puppy I crave affection and can never get enough of it. I don't play games unless they're card games, board games, computer games. I say what I'm thinking, mean what I say, and do what I said I would. You don't need to interpret or peel back the layers to find out who I really am, it's all laid out right before you. Nothing can match that love between humans and their pets, my rabbit has the amazing gift to sooth my savage soul just by letting me hold him. I love all animals except insects and I don't think they count anyways. Unfortunately I'm not as thin as I wish I was, but I'm learning to be okay with that and be comfortable in my own skin. My fave thing ever is making other people smile, those I love and complete strangers too. An innovator with a head full of ideas but no clue how I'll make them happen. No one is perfect, everyone has a past and flaws; I won't judge you so please don't judge me either. My parents are my best friends. Everyone needs a hobby, but please don't have an obsession such as sports where I can't exist in your world when a game is on TV. Let's stay up all night talking about nothing and everything. Texting is great, talking on the phone is even better, and face to face is the best. Complete movie nut both going to and staying in, wish I could rack up frequent flier miles with how often I go. I bowl horribly, mini-golf decently, and dance pretty well. I'm a collector of collections. And I'm real, so you should be too.

4 comments:

Claire Dawn said...

Cutesy!

Theaters here have point cards. 3 shows and you get a free popcorn. 3 more and you get a free movie.

Anonymous said...

Slvronthetree17 said...

Very introspective and very well written.

Can you honestly say that you've never played games with a person's emotions or feelings?

Or that you've never lied or manipulated things to your advantage?

Say it and admit it, there's no shame in it, I mean c'mon we're all being real here right?

I've done it; I've played games, I've lied, I've manipulated. I've stolen things, I've smoked pot, I've had pre-marital sex, I've broken hearts, I've said I'm sorry, I've dumped people, I've been dumped, I've tried to be a better person.

But those vices they are ingrained in us and we can bury them and ignore them and do our best to do what's right but they will always rear their ugly little heads. Best to acknowledge them and do the best that you can.

ElbieNy25 said...

@ Claire I do have a rewards card, but it takes forever to earn a free movie

@ Slyronthetree17, wish I knew your real name BTW, I didn't say I've never done these things but said I don't do them now and honestly haven't done them for probably more than a decade. I don't play games. Sorry for the confusion.

Regina said...

I love your ad and wish more people were as open and brutally honest as you are. :)

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