Bitch It Out Thursday
I graduated college seven years ago. This is not where I thought I would be. I have a trail of jobs behind me, am barely making more with my current job than I was with my very first and I'm unhappy.
I'm tired. I came into each job with enthusiasm and high hopes. I showed up early, stayed late, took on extra responsibilities/shifts/other people's work loads, drafted ideas and innovations for improvement yet it got me know where. It's frustrating when my bosses don't recognize my hard work on my reviews, in my pay, and even verbally. The words "thank you" go a long way with me, but what I got instead were nitpickers who sought out every little thing I didn't do perfectly instead of focusing on the blood, sweat, and tears I put into the job day in and day out. In order to avoid giving me well deserved raises and promotions, I was deemed average.
Maybe my problem is that I try too hard, I care too much, I put too much effort into what I do. After seven years of getting nowhere I'm drained. It may have been a few different jobs, but to me it feels like it's been the same job all this time under the same unappreciative boss.
I'm sick of the excuses I get. "You don't qualify" meanwhile someone who has been there less time with less training and attendence problems gets promoted. "I don't have the money" as you plan your two week carribean cruise vacation with your family. Just shoot it to me straight, I'm your mule and you'll work me as hard as you can paying as little as you can until I keel over and die.
What's my motivation anymore when I see others around me get paid more for doing so much less? What's my motivation when I get snapped at for coming up with ideas to trouble shoot recurring issues customers complain about? My motivation is to clock in and clock out so that my damn bills get paid. If the people above me don't care then why should I? I used to lose sleep over work, making myself physically sick trying to be better than the best. But at the end of the day I am never good enough. My college degree means nothing. And with the economy in the crapper (Thanks Bush) my options are pretty much nothing.
I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't.
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About Me
- ElbieNy25
- "Scars are proof that we were brave enough to fight the battle and strong enough to survive it"-me 2008 Unfortunately/fortunately I have many scars from life, but I'm still here. I've been writing for over twenty years and just recently finished my first manuscript entitled "The Journey". I love peopl; they fascinate me with their stories, quirks, and mysterious ways.
5 comments:
Isn't it great! I use to lose sleep over work too. I now take it much less seriously, not worth being miserable about...
I know what you mean. It's difficult. Need to draw on your strength.
My situation is a little different, but stagnation is no fun any way you slice it.
Out here, we get no feedback at all. Good or bad. It's kinda like in the movies when you hear one kid complain about an overprotective parent and the other kid says "Well at least your parent notices stuff. It would take mine a week to notice if I collapsed and was slowly biodegrading in my room."
And I'm nearing the point where I'm just here for the bills too. Not to say I don't do (and love) my actual job. But my sup leaves alot to be desired.
I hear you loud and clear, and I live it everyday. Don't know that it helps or not, but at least you're not the only one. I used to bring work home, email at night, come in early , leave late, work weekends, but no more. I work my hours and I leave. I'm spent.
Well...you are not alone girl! LOOK AT ME!! 2 degrees and years of experience with a job at a call center not using either degree!! I know how you feel! I have felt the same way...wondering why I spent so much time busting my ass in school just to be rewarded with paying loans back that I cant afford cause Im not working in my field!! I often feel defeated because of this and hold onto a small hope that I will get into the state and have some security...least there once you get past the provisional time, hell has to freeze over in order to get let go!! I, too, have busted my ass to be rewarded with nothing...be happy that you were looked over and let go...I had to fight a court case to clear my name over something that was built on someone's jealousy and ZERO truth!
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